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Posts Tagged ‘beautiful’

You see pictures of some sort of group of black and white animals with a colored animal either by itself or in the middle of the group, sometimes doing something stupid. Underneath it says something cliche like “Be yourself, everyone else is taken” or “An original is worth more than a copy.”

You start thinking, “You know, they’re right. I am unique.”

Then commercials come on with overweight people who lost 100 pounds and show the chick with nice abs. You change the channel and you see Covergirl models with beautiful flowing hair and clear skin. You change again and they’re the newest fashion or showing you the newest Iphone 12, though they just made one eight months ago.
So basically they mean: yeah, you can be yourself. But if you buy all this crap you can be awesome. Be like everyone else, because we don’t really care about you; we just want your money, so we will tell you that you look beautiful in anything if it means you will buy it.

They take movies that could be made into one and split them up in to three. They write survival guides for the end of the world. What a joke. If it’s the end of the world, no one is surviving it, and even if you did, why would you want to? I’d rather be killed in seconds by my house crushing me than to survive and freeze to death in the next ice age.

They are taught to be good sellers. They use the right colors, put ads in the right places, make you think that you need something better or different than where you’re at. Sometimes you need it, sometimes you don’t.
But you know what? That doesn’t always make you happy either. If you sway your hips towards the hottest guy and he sees something for you because you talk the talk and wear the small black dress, good for you, I guess. You can watch the movies and YouTube videos that tell you how to get the guy or girl and how to make him fall for you. But what happens when you get married and you get tired of playing the part all the time? What happens when he or she finds out who you really are? Eventually, you’re going to get tired of being what they are looking for and strive to find yourself back. Well they didn’t want the real you, they wanted the you that you let them think was you.

Maybe you can keep up the act, but then it just makes you exhausted. You can’t just be happy because you are too busy keeping up with what they expect out of you. What’s the point in getting the “right guy,” or whatever it may be, if you can’t even just enjoy it? Isn’t it easier to just act and be the way you normally are?
I’ve gotten to the point when I roll my eyes at the pictures that say “Be Yourself,” because sometimes they are from the same people that throw the pictures of beautiful people at you. But if you can look past the clichés, reach into yourself and see that they have a point. Don’t follow the world, because the world is going to shit with people who are obsessed with money, good looks, and constantly being sarcastic with tiny shorts and plunging necklines. But screw them. I wear baseball caps when I’m having a bad hair day, sweatpants when I feel like being comfortable while I’m out and about, and eat the movie popcorn without thinking about how I’m going to have to go for a run on the treadmill when I get home.

Sure, working out to get a little skinnier will make you healthier, but that doesn’t mean you need to be a size one. If you want to splurge a little on a shirt that you’ve been wanting, go for it. They may lie to you by saying it’s cute, but if you like it then that’s what matters. By buying a shirt or a plate of food that you probably didn’t need, we are actually keeping companies in business so their employees don’t lose their jobs. Just don’t overdo it. Just because you like clothes, doesn’t mean you need new ones every week, especially the ones that degrade you by being see-through and itty-bity. You’re setting yourself up to be someone’s imaginative porn star. You deserve better than that.

If you don’t treat yourself or your body with any respect, don’t expect any respect from anyone else.

If you act like someone you’re not, you are going to end up with someone who isn’t right for you. The person who will make you happiest is the person who loves the person you really are.

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I’ve really been working on my self-confidence the past few months. Surrounded by pretty girls all the time can make anyone feel self-conscious, especially when the majority of them are skinny and go for runs everyday while I sit my lazy butt on the couch and read a book. It would probably help if I didn’t eat seven pieces of pizza the other day, and I could have probably skipped the hot chocolate and chocolate Easter eggs that I had tonight, but then when I look at the older people I know, they would probably gain weight from lettuce. My metabolism may not be as high as others, but it’s definitely better now than it will be when I’m thirty. 

I have an unhealthy love for chocolate, I’ll admit it, but maybe because chocolate is the laces to my shoe. Maybe it becomes the Tequila to my margarita and pretends to be all sweet and innocent until it starts blowing up my love handles like balloon animals. But then I look in the mirror and say, “Hey, ya still got a pretty face. Wear a tshirt today and no one will even notice.” 

I live in the country, and when I’m hanging out with people I love simply being in jeans and a baseball cap, yet nowadays I hope for more hours at work just so I can go shopping for more clothes. We are never satisfied with what we have. Even when I have lost a couple pounds off my hips, I feel I still need to be skinnier. When we get money we wish for more money. It is an exhausting, never-ending cycle of wants instead of needs and complainers who like to bitch about things just so they can find someone who feels sorry for them. 

Honey, I don’t care how much you weigh. I don’t give a rats ass if you have a pimple on your forehead, crooked teeth, weird toenails, or the fact that you may need to pluck your eyebrows. 

And yes, there will be other people who care, but you know who has to live with it? You and only you. Maybe a husband or wife once you get that far, but if something small like that is going to break your relationship, then that’s pretty pathetic. 

I have a couple curves that probably don’t need to be there. I wish I had gotten braces when I was younger so I could have a nicer smile and or that I could find the will to stop chewing my nails so I can wear fingernail polish again, but when I get up in the morning, I don’t necessarily always feel beautiful, but I’m comfortable enough with myself to be okay with it. 

There will always be someone who doesn’t like you. There will always be someone prettier, smarter, funnier, nicer, taller, skinnier, and so on and so forth. If you can find satisfaction with yourself, then simply give a smile to the rest of the world, even if you decide to walk out in sweatpants for the day. If you don’t mind, they don’t matter. 

I don’t need to know who you are to tell you that you have something beautiful about yourself. The more you put-down yourself, the easier it is for you to let others put you down. Confidence itself can be beautiful when it’s not taken over the top. Start there, and you’ll find what makes you beautiful.

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For every voice that tells someone they are idiotic, there should be two voices telling them they are wonderful.

For every two voices that tell someone they can’t make it, there should be five voices telling them they can.

If you tear someone down too much, after awhile, they start believing you.

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I learned today that Midwest people are more passive-aggressive. We are nice, but it takes A LOT to get us to open up. Vulnerability has become something we are almost ashamed of.

In high school, there were 3 ways in which you could approach vulnerability. You could either blab it to the world about how much of a heartache it was to not see your boyfriend for two days, you could find one person whom you could actually trust to not say anything, or you kept it to yourself for reasons of your own.

I was one of the people that kept things to myself. There were A LOT of blabber mouths around my school, and if you told the wrong person, you can bet everyone would know about it, even though they wouldn’t talk about it. I am also from a small school, so everyone knew you, and you even had kids younger than you giving you snobby looks. For me, my problem wasn’t necessarily that I didn’t have anyone to talk to, because I actually had two best friends whom I know without a doubt wouldn’t tell a soul if I asked them to keep it quiet, but more the fact that I didn’t want anyone to know I was in pain about something.

There are people all over the world who are going through more problems than we are. I know that, you know that. Yet there are still the people who whine and bitch and act like they have the worst life imaginable, and it makes you want to punch them in the face for their stupidity. We all have many things to be grateful for, even in times of sorrow. A lot of the people I knew who would complain were also doing it for attention, which ticked me off even more.

I didn’t want to express anything on the downside because I always reminded myself that there were people who were going through worse, and I just needed to toughen this out and stop whining to myself.

If you were someone like me, yes there are people in the world who are having a worse day than you, but don’t let that stop you from talking to someone. There is a difference between proclaiming your pain to the world to get sympathy from others and telling someone your pain so you can figure a way out of it. I kept so much in because I didn’t want people thinking I was a wimp, and that has led to present grudges and memories that are hard for me to let go.

Find someone whom you trust and open up to them. Let someone else know you so they can help you figure out why you do some of the things you do, why you feel the way you feel, maybe even help bring light to things even you haven’t noticed and bring peace to problems you can’t solve on your own. You aren’t superman, so don’t try to do this on your own. People need people, even if you are someone who would rather be alone.

Just because you’re problems may not be the life or death of you, doesn’t mean they aren’t important. Just be careful how you express yourself. Be self-AWARE, not self-ABSORBED; and remind yourself that things will get better and that this is just a block in the road that you can get past with some encouragement. Counseling is nothing to be ashamed of, and is something I actually think everyone should do a couple sessions of.

We think that brokenness is something to be frowned upon and must be kept hidden…but when you think about it, the kingdom of heaven was BUILT for the broken, a place where the broken come together, and a place where the broken are given a new life, new start, a new filling that can’t be found anywhere else.

Your vulnerabilities make you beautiful. They are not something to be ashamed of, but rather something to embrace, to learn from, to use through your life. Live wisely.

 

If this interests you, listen to Brene Brown on her TED TALK about Vulnerability. It is great!

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I legitly love people. I moved back to college for my junior year 2 days ago and as I sit looking out my window, a bunch of the new freshman are just outside by the sand volleyball court and pond, grilling hot dogs, playing volleyball, playing bean bags, chinese ladders, and sitting in circles on the grass talking and hanging out.

The Bible says that above anything else, we are here to love people. If you can bring someone to Christ, bring them out of the pit of poverty and help them back to their feet, or just put a smile on their face for the first time in a week, awesome…but we need to love, and looking outside, I only know five out of probably seventy-five people that I see, but I love them. I don’t know them, but I don’t need to. I see what God must see when He looks down on us–the life in our eyes, the smiles on our faces, even the limp in our legs. I don’t know if that guy is wearing a vikings Tshirt cause he actually likes the Vikings, or because he got it for free ; I don’t know if that girl likes volleyball, or if she’s just playing because her friends are; I don’t know if that guy is playing beanbags cause he wanted to, or if one of the guys dared him into playing. I don’t know anything about any of these people, I can only make guesses.

I’m not a creeper, I promise, but there is something soothing about watching people. As a writer, it is basically my job to watch life, watch love, watch the sun rise and set so I can describe them in my writing. I need to see deeper than what the eye glances over, see the piece of gum squished by a thousand high heels and dirt-stained tennis shoes because someone was too lazy to walk an extra six steps to a trashcan. The eye misses so much. They don’t know I’m watching them from my dorm room window. If they looked up here, they might be able to see me, even though there is enough daylight to make glares, but they are too busy talking to friends, flirting with guys, and living what they know as their lives.

Most will go back to their dorms, maybe a few to rooms with quiet roommates that make things awkward, maybe a few to the student center to flirt with whoever else they can meet. If I knew them personally, a couple would probably annoy me, a couple may make me blush, a couple may even turn into good friends, but for right now, I love them if they were my own kids.

Learn to love everyone, and when you look out your window, maybe you will see the beauty that I see, the casualness as they fling a frisbee, the way they lay on the grass and read a book. So normal, yet beautiful. Beautiful people.

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Have you noticed how contradictory the world is? They tell us to be comfortable in our own skin, that we are “perfect the way we are”…and then they slather people in makeup, do close-ups on a couple pimples or slightly shaggy skin, and make us feel like we aren’t pretty enough or skinny enough to be called beautiful. No wonder actors and singers go into drugs and get wasted. We put so much pressure on them, and it can turn a sweet person into a Jerk.

Peer pressure has insane power on us all the time that makes us do things we say we’d never do…and why? Just to get acceptance from people who shouldn’t treat us like that in the first place? Signs say “Just Say No,” but saying no when you are surrounded and outnumbered by people who expect you to say yes…a lot harder when you’re in the moment.

But if we can’t say no to the small things…what will become of us when worse things come our way? It will seem small now, but when you give in, you may think you are in control of it, but it is already in control of you. If they are your friends, you should be able to say no around them. If they keep pushing you, then why do you hang around? It won’t be a one-time thing; they will keep persuading you to do more and more until you are a different person. Find the people you can be yourself around, not the people who you feel like you have to be better. It is good to have people to push you mentally with school work and stuff like that, but when it comes to being who you are, you shouldn’t have to change just because they have problems with it.

If you are shy, like me, trying to push yourself to be out there and conversive…it makes me feel uptight. Once I found friends that actually love to talk a lot, they like being with me because I’m a listener, yet they still let me pipe in every now and then and give my life story while they ask questions and share theirs.

My first semester in college, we were split into halls where we do activities with that hall and a “brother hall” which is a guy’s hall. Most of the girls were fun and nice…the kind of people I like being around…but I didn’t feel myself at all. They ended up not even talking to me , and I felt like I wasn’t being “fun” enough. Since I wasn’t popular in high school, I wanted to try and be in it now…

But then I started making other friends from my classes, people I felt comfortable around. They weren’t the populars, but turns out I’m just not built to be one of them, and I’ve finally learned to accept that.

So be yourself, and you will find that, even if they aren’t the people you are hoping for, they are people who love you for you and won’t try to change you. You were built to be you and will never be happy trying to be someone “better.”

You have probably heard it all before, but maybe that just means we are on to something that others don’t want to listen to.

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